Approved!! Where has he been living all these years? In a barrel?

he hasN’T DONE WHAT? YOU BE A GOOD GIRLFRIEND, EXPOSE HIM TO IT.

((fight the good fight hiem))

DREAMER. YOU WILL LOVE THAT MAN. YOU NEED TO WATCH THOSE MOVIES, DAMMIT. GO DO IT. I COMMAND YOU.

Guys he hasn’t seen any of the Iron Mans, Thor, Avengers…I have such a long way to go but it will be worth it uwu I am patient and kind and I LOVE THESE MOVIES FUCK YES

dREAMER HAS NEVER SEEN THE IRON MAN MOVIES

Everyone can we just take a moment to think about the fact that Dreamer, of all people, has not had exposure to Tony Stark.

Like the one Marvel character I can see him loving to pieces. You guys know you agree. Dreamer is gonna love Tony Stark.

So I, as a good girlfriend, shall expose him.

> Refreshes dashboard

> …

> GDI DARK I QUIT

randomtengureporter:

Were the twig aware of the amusement its simple presence granted, it probably would have bowed politely, and then went to see if the pink goo was being courted by anyone. Anyone else hear wedding bells tolling? Daichi’s eyebrows rose in surprise. Inwardly, he’d always figured it was the Lunarian who wanted to keep things under wraps; not the other way around. “You would have helped me, Honored? Was something about the announcement disagreeable or insufficient?” Other than it not being the headline and a full page article, complete with color pictures, he would probably have asked were he feeling spiteful. Would Kaguya be as interested in helping had she known how much work it would have been?

Indeed, the desire for children, and difficulty therein, was a point the two shared in common, but it would have embarrassed the Karasu immensely to discuss the matter with Kaguya; what right has a man with a broken knee to complain about his disability to the woman with no legs? Never mind the difficulty with admitting that it might be due to some imagined deficiency on his own part. That was the sort of thing that could keep any prideful man awake at night, particularly when one wasn’t aware of the simple biological incompatibility between Youkai and Humans. Still, the negative thoughts were swept aside, as leaves on a breeze, and leaving only a slightly leering Daichi in their wake.

“Oh, yes,” he answered with gusto, “many enjoyable evenings and years to us both!” The reporter lifted his tea cup in salute and took a draught. “Tell me, Princess… Do you take any extra relish in sharing your bed with someone with whom you held such animosity until so recently?”  An indecent question, perhaps, but asked in a teasing enough tone shared between two friends. What need have we for lines, if not for toe-ing?

The odor of something cooking didn’t go unnoticed, and the more harmonious sounds of a competent cook plying their craft was a welcome change. He willed it not to, but his stomach growled in appreciation. Maybe she won’t notice, the reporter hoped and tapped his pen against the page. “I’m glad that the classification doesn’t offend, Ms Kaguya, and yes, I have perused through Honored Hieda’s works,” he remarked with just a touch of admiration for a fellow chronicler of the times. Sort of… “But the truth remains, that her works are oriented for Humans to learn about Youkai, and not really the other way around. Plus, your own entry spends more time on what you are capable of, rather than who you are! And her entry on Senior Editor Shameimaru? Woefully inadequate!” The Tengu joined in his guest’s chuckling, but for completely different reasons.

Then it was time for work, and work Daichi did; transcribing his friend’s words as rapidly as she spoke them, and adding some speculation and notes when she paused for good measure. Further, he tried to imagine what 300 years of combat with someone as powerful as Mokou would be like, but quickly gave the thought up. “Alright, let’s call that… Powerful, but Restrained. How does that sound,” he asked with a grin and neglected to mention that one of the Yuukas actually held the same classification. “On the flip side, what could a Youkai do to better ingratiate themselves to you, or otherwise curry favor? If, say, they got lost and stumbled into Eientei, or were being burned to death by your wife and wanted your help to stop the attack?”

“You take offense where none is meant, friend!” Kaguya promised, raising both eyebrows and waving her hand as if to clear the air of any sort of misunderstanding before it could settle in and poison the atmosphere between them. “I only mean that I was pleased enough with the article that I surely would have answered any questions and been most helpful, not that I found it disatisfactory.” She promised, setting down her glass and giving a miniscule laugh that rolled straight into the air and hung there a moment, dancing about. “I only to say that I would have given my assistance and thorough cooperation. The article was quite surprising, but pleasing on my end of the spectrum.” The Princess nodded astutely to confirm her words. Shifting where she sat, her hands folded gracefully into her lap, noting without really looking the presence of a few inaba peaking curiously around a corner. She did not scold them: they knew that Kaguya did enjoy company quite a bit, and sometimes they listened in just to see if they could catch wind of the stories she told often. 

That was not what they received today, however. When the teasing question caught her ear, it was a sly smile and a slight lean over the table, a dramatic stage whisper, that was his response. “Daichi, that is a most innapropriate question, and so my answer will follow suit.” She told him whimsically and grinned wide. “I can assure you that not all of our animosity has run it’s entire course, at least where the bedroom is concerned. We’ve had to make several repairs to furniture and walls over the course of things. There’s really absolutely nothing the two of us can not try.” There was a round of laughter that bordered on cackling and she leaned back again, cheeks rosy with humor and delight. “Why! Once, she got so flustered and excited that she accidentally lit me on fire from the inside, if you understand what I’m implying.” Both perfect eyebrows rose up and disappeared even further behind her bangs, waggling suggestively at the reporter. “Make sure to leave that out of your article. I would recover from Mokou’s wrath, but I can’t promise you would be so lucky.”

“On the subject of such, if one were to desire to enter my favor, they need only make a good impression. I am not so hard to please, I suppose. Guests are always welcomed at Eientei, and I am always most delighted to entertain. I have kept many families company while Eirin tended to their loved ones.” Her shoulders rolled in something of a shrug and she filled both of their glasses again just as Reisen appeared with a plate of freshly prepared fish for them. It was steaming, laying atop a bed of lettuce and other vegetables, and Kaguya thanked her with a smile before dismissing the lunar rabbit. “Please, help yourself to as much as you’d like. We are not lacking in anything here, and food is no exception.”

As she allowed Daichi to fill his plate and his stomach if he so desired, she pondered over if it were really possible for her to stop Mokou, or if she ever really desired to. Well, she supposed what the reasons behind the rage were, and things of that nature. “Normally I would not allow Mokou to hurt someone on the grounds of Eientei, but there have been occasions before where I have not stopped her nor cared to stop her. She won’t kill a human unless given ridiculously good reason, so most people are safe here. The most you have to worry about is falling victim to a leftover trap left by Tewi, as we have had a few visitors stumble into ‘forgotten’ pranks meant for Reisen.” The way she said ‘forgotten’ implied she hardly believed they were actually so, all things considered. “Mokou will, generally, give quite a few very loud barks before she actually bites. Youkai are a bit different, though.”

Here there was another pause and she sipped her tea thoughtfully. “Any respectful Youkai is welcomed here. So long as you do not harm the rabbits, patients, or residents you should be fine. It is just as well that you do not attempt to damage the grounds or the forest surrounding them. Do these things and you will not be in any danger, although I can not promise my wife will be entirely polite. However, while I would stop Mokou from hurting a regular human on our grounds, I can not say the same for Youkai or magic wielders. They pose more of a threat, and so have to be handled as such. You do not handle a boulder with the same gentle touch that you would a vase. It may seem crass, but considering that we open our home as a place of safety, refuge, and healing, we have to be able to uphold such a thing through whatever means necessary. It would be terrible for business if a youkai were to hurt a human, be it on purpose or inadvertantly. To put it quite simply, if you would like to gain favor with myself or this household, then be mindful of yourself. Act as a beast and I shall treat you as one.”